she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
only if we run a train.
done.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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