Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
Princesses don't give blow jobs
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
Randomize
