The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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