Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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