Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
your room smells of hookers.
And success
Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
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