Apparently you make a good broom.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Randomize
