She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
