Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
