Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
