No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
Randomize
