i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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