either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
