Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize