and she was petting her beer can
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Randomize
