what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
