The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Very mixed signals tonight. He gave me the best handjob while gloating about the Superbowl to his dad on the phone. When he was done he left me on the sofa alone for ten minutes before returning with wet wipes beer and nachos.
Randomize
