I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
