is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
