And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
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