we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
