I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
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