Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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