Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
