you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize
