I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
Randomize
