Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
smell my finger.
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
