I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Randomize
