i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
