If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
This show inspires me to have sex in space
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize
