Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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