I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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