I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize