Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
