just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
