Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
