who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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