Can i not drive my cunt home
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
