i just bought a vibrator and the cashier says "have fun with that." i didnt realise what he said so i responded "you too." and then he gave me his number...
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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