Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
i think im in europe. pls send help
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
