Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Randomize
