If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
