I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
I'm like, not good at living.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
