We're facebook friends in real life
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
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