I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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