I think I just saw someone hide a body.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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