I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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