god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
