Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
That's why my New Years resolution was no more blondes. They're all bad news
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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