these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
Randomize
