when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
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